Turns out, I really actually do have to go to work this week. I kind of thought I'd wake up today and it would be June again, but no such luck.
1) I am officially divorced. I haven't really talked about "That Whole Thing" here ... or anywhere, really, but it happened, and it's over. I had to sit on a witness stand and sort of felt like it was 1998 again and I was in trouble at the dining room table. The judge was bald and had a booming voice - like mi papi, and my attorney was no-nonsense ... like my mama. I sat there mostly bewildered as the questions rolled in. Ten years all combined into roughly ten minutes in an uncomfortable chair in a courtroom with bad lighting and carpet.
As Liz Gilbert (one of my favorite authors) says though - onward.
2) Someone very dear to me was diagnosed with breast cancer recently. While hers was caught at stage zero (insert hands raised emoji here), there are still surgical ramifications and radiation. If you could just keep my fam bam in your prayers, that would be swell.
3) The General is one week out from his last wubby encounter. I feel like this warrants the celebratory beer I'm currently drinking.
4) Earlier today, I posted on FB about my work pants not fitting all that well because of all of the napping/celebratory beer drinking I did this summer. I feel like I should mention I'm no longer training for a half marathon because f all of that biznass. I feel like I should also mention that they'll fit better as soon as all of these no bake cookies are out of my house.
5) I'm still meal planning like a BOSS and do you think "nacho platter" is a suitable dinner choice? I mean. It is. Right? Right. Let me know what you decide.
6) Instead of complaining to you about how I cannot, for the life of me, write anything worth anything lately, I'll tell you instead about how I have five cardigans in my Amazon cart. Five. All different colors (yea right): Black. Sorta black. Black button up. Black open front. Black drapey. Send help.
7) My goal for this quarter (notice I didn't say year) is to be a little more organized. I feel like I fell off the wagon when I had Tuck, and then was completely derailed by the whole Big D thing ... so I'm going to roll in baby steps. Tomorrow is our trial run. Tuck's breakfast is sitting out, his clothes are out, I have a list of outfits for me for the rest of the week, and dinner for tomorrow has already been prepped. Go ahead and ask me how I'm doing like next ... Tuesday. Tuck probably won't have on any pants and I'll probably have crazy eyes. If you have any stunning morning routine tips for a two year old and a cray cray lady that always wants to sleep for just five more minutes until it's seriously go time and EVERYONE IS GOING TO BE LATE FOR EVERYTHING, then please, send them my way.
8) Speaking of dressing The General, I had to put another pair of tennis shoes up today because he's growing like a champion. At this rate, he'll be 8'10. Stacking another (larger) pair of Nikes on top of his last (smaller) pair made me a little sad face. Where does the dang time go?
9) The saaaa-weetest lady gave me a couple of pumpkins the other day. I cleaned my flower pots out, tossed my ferns (don't tell anyone, but they were sort of dead anyway), and dug out my garden. It's time, people. My fall scented candles are lit, my Halloween decorations ready to be put out, and I ordered Tuck's costume last weekend. Heck, I even made apple cider muffins yesterday. Because fall. It's fall.
10) Yesterday, in the midst of my power-clean-holy-crap-school-starts-in-two-days-and-my-closet-still-is-a-wreck, I leaned over and whacked my forehead on the gate that is supposed to be at the top of the stairs. Basically, it feels like I should have a broken forehead/sinus cavity and it was pretty much reason enough to stop freaking cleaning. Everything happens for a reason, right? Jesus was like, "No mas, Becky. Your closet can wait. You have Pinteresting to do." So I listened. Of course. And I threw the freaking gate away.
11) I'm ending on an odd number because I'm a rebel. While I rocked Tuck tonight, I thought I'd maybe convert his crib to a toddler bed this week. He's two. He uses the railing to jump. It might be time. I'm no expert. Anyway. My point is that I didn't. Because I had these nightmarish flashes of every single time I quietly and slowly walked into my parent's bedroom and tap, tap, tapped my mom on the shoulder to wake her up like some kind of evil child ... just because I was thirsty or something. She wasn't ever "just" startled. She screamed. Then dad yelled. And then I left Tuck's crib in tact.
I love you like I love my unkempt closet!
. About Moi .
I love, love, love flannel sheets and I am really passionate about lists on post it notes and most of the time I'm sad that no one else is as excited as I am about Diet Mountain Dew. I also adore run-on sentences.
He saw her before he saw
anything else in the room.
- F. Scott Fitzgerald
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